Well, it’s Christmas day. Can you believe it? It was weird last night, lying in bed around midnight, and feeling so nostalgic for all the Christmases from my childhood and growing up. I wondered just how long it’d been since I last felt that child spark of magic related to the season. Yep, I was fourteen last I remember. I remember just feeling so happy to be with the family and being all excited over the interesting gifts my father would bring frmo from out of state where he worked. I guess when you get older and things get more complicated and your mind realizes all these things, that innocent joy and Christmas magic just fade.
I was upset over the weekend when my one sister, who’s left home, was going to spend Christmas with her fiance’s relatives. IT made me angry and hurt me that she chose to spend the day with them, instead of our family. It had to do with her not getting along with Dad but it hhurt me to thikn she wouldn’t just come for me and my sister’s and mother’s sake. So, this morning I awoke, aware of the missing family member and having this hollow place within me. I tried my best to cheer up but even now I still feel today, a very holy and special day out of the year, isn’t as fulfilled as it could be. ARE these sad realities of life the reason we lose that Christmas wonder we had as kids?
I remember me and my sister, the one who’s moved out, would be so excited on Christmas Eve that we hardly slept. WE played old Christmas tapes while in bed. Sometimes Dad would allow us to open one or two gifts on Chrismtas Eve to satisfy our crazy impatience. Yes, they were great times, us all together around the tree and exchanging gifts and then sitting all inthein the mounds of colored paper and bows. Besides the gifts, though, the whole day, the air itself, seemed to thrive with the mysterious Christmas magic that’d last all the way till dark. NO matter how hard I try, I can’t find that Christmas magic. The real magic, though, is in the beautiful spiritual meaning of the Christmas tree and, of course,, the amazing story behind the nativity scene on the coffee table. Yes, family’s a very big part of Christmas, too, which is probably why today I miss my sister very much. But then I think of all the people without any families to be with–The homeless people right now in the cold alleyways under ragged blankets and eating some meager handout for breakfast. Or those in the hospital right now about to die, or who are very sick or those having major surgery. And what about the starving children and families in other countries or in Haiti? You know, I always think it’s so silly how we get all super charitable around this time of year to all these people. What about the other 364 days of the year? They got to eat then, too, you know? Well, just a lot of thoughts on my mind today I felt like sharing. In the meantime, it’s time to celebrate what we have, to treausre treasure it all while we can. From charity, optomism, hope, and greatfulness. Indeed, in the end, these are the true wonders of Christmas.
